Swedish homeware purveyors Ikea have launched a satirical and topical campaign around new kitchen designs for our would-be Prime Ministers, The RUDDIK and ABBUT.
The tongue in cheek ads, running today in several newspapers, include features pertinent to each leader’s personality, including a “REPOSITORIUM: A clever storage solution for books and academic journals, to maintain the ‘suppository repository of all knowledge’.”
Rudd’s design includes a “FOTO FRAMIA: A framed ‘Kevin ‘07’ jersey, ideal for the man who’s his own biggest fan”, and a “RECYCLIA: A recycling bin so that policies and other GYLL√ÖRD remnants can be smartly disposed of”.
The ABBUT comes complete with a “RACKENCOAT: A coat rack to host a variety of outfits including a fireman’s jacket, a bike helmet and budgie smugglers” and a “HIDDEN-CUPBOARDIA: Smart storage solutions mean that policy details can be kept out of sight from prying eyes”.
See all the features of these two kitchens below or visit www.ikea.com.au/election.
Angela McCann, IKEA Australia spokesperson said: “At Ikea, our mission is to create a better everyday life at home; and with two distinctive and very different personalities potentially moving into The Lodge for the long term, we thought they could do with a helping hand and inspiration to make sure their kitchen is perfectly suited to them.
“Both kitchen designs have everything on hand that each would-be PM could need and with our affordable prices, we know the taxpayer will be kept happy.”
The specs:
RUDDIK
This IKEA kitchen solution draws inspiration from designs and accessories popular in the late noughties
1. Kontakt-keeper
Keep laptop, tablet and mobile phone within easy reach so that you’re never too far away to share your LOL and FML moments on Twitter or Instagram.
2. Noos-unite
Keep the media junkie in you satisfied with a wall mounted TV that remains in easy vision.
3. Foto Framia
Large, wall mountable frame, ideal for displaying family photos or reinforcing the support for your favourite political player, even if it is yourself.
4. Grydlepannen
Be a man of the people by throwing a sausage on the grill and having a chinwag with the family. Don’t forget the sauce!
5. Expeediensy-extracta
Ensure your kitchen is free of cooking smells or any whiff of political expediency with this powerful extraction fan.
6. Innacirklen-tabl
Spacious kitchen table, perfect for hosting any emergency Kitchen Cabinet meetings.
7. Spinn-stoola
Bar stool with non-slip footrest, meaning it will take at least 75% of your party to oust you. Extra features include a swivel function for any necessary spinning during political debates.
8. Sver-jarren
Guilty of letting the occasional bad word slip? Repent with this large swear jar, perfect for storing loose change.
9. Dishwashaa
Powerful but silent dishwasher, meaning you can eradicate any evidence of dirt with more ruthless efficiency than a Sussex Street clean out.
10. Recyclia
A sudden overspill of Gyllård policies to dispose of? Make sure you recycle smartly with this large paper-friendly bin.
11.VoVo-dispensaa
Keep the iced VoVos fresh when you need to pop the kettle on for a cosy family pow-wow or election strategy meeting.
12.Cupboarden
Easy and quick to assemble cupboards make difficult cabinet reshuffles a thing of the past.
13.Knivenrackem
Handy knife rack that keeps knives in the open and accounted for, to avoid being stabbed in the back by fellow party members or ex-PMs planning revenge.
14. Saf-ruggen
Keep this rug from being pulled out from under you, by securing it firmly underneath the kitchen table.
15.Repositorium
Large and clever storage solution for books and academic journals, will ensure your status of ‘suppository repository of all knowledge’ is maintained.
√ÖBBUTT
A traditional IKEA kitchen concept that has been updated with a recent 'modern' makeover
1. Foto Shrinen
Want to pay tribute to the person that you idolise? This wall frame is perfect for portrait-style prints.
2. Shloganboardia
These handy chalkboards allow you to strategically place punchy three-word slogans around the kitchen, to help keep your family focused and on track.
3. Rackencoat
Sturdy legs and ample hooks to ensure a variety of accessories are on hand for the modern day action man.
4. Stoolaa
This stool has supportive legs and comfortable cushioning to accommodate any corporate patriarchs or other heavyweights that come to visit.
5. Stor-knifa
Handy knife storage for convenient access, whatever your slicing and dicing needs – meats, vegetables or pesky leadership contenders.
6. Electrik Ovenaa
Electric hob and oven with extra safety features, so you never have to find your inner firefighter.
7. Woopsie Moppa
Easy to access mop, to help quickly clean up the mess from any accidental leaking of right-wing viewpoints and other social gaffs.
8. Hidden-Cupboardia
Have policy details you want to keep out of public view? These smart storage solutions will help keep your secrets under wraps.
9. Freezo
Practice your icy stare for objectionable journalists while investigating dinner options in this spacious freezer.
10.Whisken
This lightweight whisk will always be close to hand if you find yourself needing to be whisked away from challenging situations e.g. press conferences.
11.Sinke
Need to practice turning back boats? This large sink holds plenty of water so that you can perfect your technique.
12.Binna
Have any taxes that you need to scrap, fast? This large bin is ideal for food remains, carbon taxes, mining taxes and any other kitchen waste.
;cÔøΩ:lPÔøΩ" stool has supportive legs and comfortable cushioning to accommodate any corporate patriarchs or other heavyweights that come to visit.
5. Stor-knifa
Handy knife storage for convenient access, whatever your slicing and dicing needs – meats, vegetables or pesky leadership contenders.
6. Electrik Ovenaa
Electric hob and oven with extra safety features, so you never have to find your inner firefighter.
7. Woopsie Moppa
Easy to access mop, to help quickly clean up the mess from any accidental leaking of right-wing viewpoints and other social gaffs.
8. Hidden-Cupboardia
Have policy details you want to keep out of public view? These smart storage solutions will help keep your secrets under wraps.
9. Freezo
Practice your icy stare for objectionable journalists while investigating dinner options in this spacious freezer.
10.Whisken
This lightweight whisk will always be close to hand if you find yourself needing to be whisked away from challenging situations e.g. press conferences.
11.Sinke
Need to practice turning back boats? This large sink holds plenty of water so that you can perfect your technique.
12.Binna
Have any taxes that you need to scrap, fast? This large bin is ideal for food remains, carbon taxes, mining taxes and any other kitchen waste.