Stop The Presses! Sunrise Cash Cow Identity Revealed!

Stop The Presses! Sunrise Cash Cow Identity Revealed!
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They’ve insulted international celebrities and seen their technology go to shit, and now Sunrise has seen the identity of its Cash Cow revealed.

During this morning’s show, which came to viewers live from Palm Beach in Sydney’s north, the cow lost his head after a steamy make-out sesh with his newfound love, per news.com.au where you can see the revealing video.

“The Cash Cow’s found a girlfriend today,” Samantha Armytage said.

“There’s love at Home and Away today, of the bovine nature,” Kochi added.

But during the romantic embrace (not at all suitable for the kiddies at home), it appears the Cash Cow’s head wasn’t attached and fell to the ground.

But who is behind the Cash Cow facade? A man! A man with short brown hair and stubble, granted we wouldn’t shave for TV either if we hid under a cow costume.

“Stop it, you’re a girl, oh my god,” Armytage said through incessant laughter.

“Cut away,” Kochie added.

“I hope no children are watching,” Armytage concluded, and just like that the segment was over.

Over the past few years, she, or apparently now he, has given away over $4 million to breakfast viewers, including the enormous $80,000 on Monday morning.

We’re tuning in tomorrow to see what else could go wrong.

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