Do you think Sydney breakfast radio can’t possibly plumb more puerile depths? Well, fear not, as it appears we’ve reached a new low.

Two stalwarts of the industry – 2SM’s John Laws and KISS FM’s Kyle Sandilands – have been involved in one of the more bizarre on-air tête-à-tête’s for a while.

Promoting a new biography about himself (which he openly admits he hasn’t even read) the 81-year-old Laws told Sydney’s The Daily Telegraph that when it came Sandilands – who many argue is Laws’ protégé – “crap comes easy”.

Laws suggested Sandilands spoke a lot of crap on-air so as to get noticed. “I don’t think he had to act very much,” Laws said. “I think crap comes easy to Kyle.” However, he added that he thought Sandilands was a “nice fella underneath”.

In retort, Sandilands mentioned Laws’ comments on his breakfast show this morning. He started by questioning the article itself – “If anyone is full of shit it’s The Daily Telegraph,” Sandliands said.

He then turned his attack on Laws: “If crap falls out of anyone it’s Laws and that’s because he can’t form a hard stool anymore because of his age,’ he retorted, before clarifying that, ‘I’m not talking about his mouth, I’m talking about his crap shute. The friendship’s over by the way.”

“Only a loser would do that,’ he railed. “I don’t do that. I don’t plan to do or say things for attention. I’ve never done that ever,” he told listeners.

From there, Sandilands veered off onto even more bizarre and dangerous tangent. He suggested that when Laws was recently interviewed by the ABC’s 7.30 Report host Leigh Sales “he probably like Trump where thinks because he’s famous he can grab Leigh Sales pussy”.

He added: ‘They’re from that old school, where they actually believe the old Frank Sinatra vibe where ‘I can do anything to anyone because I’m famous’.”

Sandilands added that men would regularly grab the genitals of females. “The stuck up ones you can’t grab, the feminists you can’t grab. But like there are people out there you can grab by the pussy. It does happen,” Sandilands said.