Home » Corona Crazies! Penis Pasta, Americans Panic Buy Guns, Where’s Wally; Plus, The Ultimate In Live TV Avoidance

17 March, 2020

Corona Crazies! Penis Pasta, Americans Panic Buy Guns, Where’s Wally; Plus, The Ultimate In Live TV Avoidance

B&T doesn’t need to tell you these are indeed crazy times! Most of us are now holed-up at home praying the canned soup we’ve stockpiled doesn’t give us diarrhoea as we’ve totally run out of toilet paper.

A quick glance at any news site, TV report or newspaper and COVID-19 dominates from the front news page through to the back sports page.

But if you can get past the doom and gloom and images of people buying 300 rolls of latrine paper and the entire aisle of hand sanitiser, then there have been some absolute nuggets to cherish.

Check out some of the lunacy that happened across B&T’s desk overnight.

PENIS PASTA

Much like in Australia, apparently pasta is being stripped bare from British supermarket shelves as desperate shoppers panic buy.

Not to miss a trick, adult site Ann Summers has revealed it has a stack of the stuff in-stock, albeit shaped like a penis.

The sex toy and lingerie retailer is offering a free box of the phallic-shaped pasta shells – valued at £5 ($A10) – when customers buy two or more things from the site.

Ann Summers website says the pasta is “hysterical and completely delicious” and even increases in size when cooked. And, let’s be honest, none of your dinner guests will be offended, because everyone’s in self-isolation.

WOMEN “SELF-ISOLATING” HILARIOUSLY DODGES TV INTERVIEW

Meanwhile, footage has emerged of a woman leaving an Australian grocery store, only to be caught by a news crew reporting on shopper hoarding out the front.

The unnamed footage has appeared on News.com.au and shows the young woman shocked to find herself front and centre of the broadcast. Her attempts to make herself invisible are hilarious with social media suggesting she should’ve, in fact, be at home self-isolating.

Thankfully, others were more supportive. “Not fair guys! She clearly didn’t want to be filmed so you post her face unpixellated?!” tweeted one. Check out how not to make the news below:

When you told work you’re self-isolating… #coronavirus pic.twitter.com/TG7JJjsR5D
— news.com.au (@newscomauHQ) March 16, 2020

MEANWHILE IN THE US, EVERYONE’S PANIC BUYING… GUNS!

Forget toilet paper and tinned sardines, in the US it appears the American shopper is stocking up on firearms to (literally) fight off the coronavirus.

Reports out of the US have said gun sales are “skyrocketing” over fears as the virus spreads.

Apparently there are three main reasons why (and they’re all as alarming as the next.) People fear panic could get so bad that they will be forced to defend their families and their food stocks and that’s forced many first-time gun owners to head down the local gun store.

Others have said they are worried that the government might use its emergency powers to restrict gun purchases.

While, even more alarmingly, Asian Americans are buying pistols amid fears they may be targeted because of their ethnicity and rising fears about the spread of the coronavirus.

Channel Nine’s US correspondent Amelia Adams tweeting a video of people lining up outside a gun shop in Los Angeles. She said those in the queue were telling her they were “scared of what will happen if people run out of food and supplies, and they need to protect their families”.

Panicked shoppers in the United States are lining the streets to purchase guns as an overwhelming sense of fear sweeps the country. @AmeliaAdams9 #9News pic.twitter.com/0kqRj16ClE
— Nine News Australia (@9NewsAUS) March 15, 2020

AT LEAST WHERE’S WALLY’S NO LONGER HARD TO FIND

And, to finish off, even kids’ favourite Where’s Wally has found time to have a laugh in the face of the global pandemic.

As everyone self-isolates, borders are closed and outdoor gatherings banned, as you can see by some wag’s viral media post, our striped-shirt friend is becoming far less lost in the crowd!

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